Vodka for me is one of those drinks. I’ve had one too many of them in those defining years of your life where “you just wanna party”. Now even a whiff of the spirit makes me think about that time I woke up in hospital with a drip in my arm and a bloody face from passing out face first into the concrete on Commercial Road. Wait, that was from tequila, but the fact remains that spirits are evil and make me dry retch when I get a whiff of them.
Vodka, Borsch and Tears is a hardworking hybrid cafe/bar/restaurant. It stocks on its shelves over 100 unique types of vodkas. Ow shiet. But anyways, I was here for the food. They serve up Russian and Polish influenced cuisine, including their signature borsch. It’s a beetroot broth served a la Polish or Russian. There’s a huge selection of tapas style nibbles, mains, soups and the best fun is trying to pronounce all of them. When in Russia, do what the Russians do so eat like a Russian, eat for warmth. The best dishes were the ‘hearty’ ones, the Russians do meat good. Their vegetarian attempts were fairly pathetic. So, bring your omnivorous vodka and beetroot loving friends. Perfect for sharing in a small group, but leave the fussy eaters at home for this one. For those of you who can’t stomach spirits like me, they have a nice selection of Polish beers.
To end, I’ll leave you with the philosophy of Vodka, Borsch and Tears: “first is drunk for health, second for pleasure, third for tears, fourth for madness!” Na zdorovje!
Info: 173 Chapel Street, Prahran (03) 9530 2694
How much money to bring: $25-35 (more if you’re drinking)
OK to bring a date? Yes – if he/she likes vodka
It’s closed on: (open 7 days)
Don’t: get too trashed and throw up your nice food
Do: share the tapas
Sounds like: Pluto – Bjork (Borsch.)